Look at all the Pretty Colors!

I know I didn't post yesterday, sorry about that. But I had a good reason: I was on a romantic getaway with JHDub! It was pretty sweet. It was kind of an impromptu thing, we just packed my Nelly Furtado cds and some Pringles, and that was it. Not even any underwear (it wasn't really needed anyways).

There was also some business mixed in with our pleasure. Willy has some contacts from the slammer, and we're well on our way to becoming a major player in the drug business. Our drug cartel that we started is, that is. Should be a pretty nice way to supplement my income. As a symbol of my new found wealth, I'm on my way to pick up some exotic animals. They will so pretty and be awesome for me, it's going to be great. I'll let you know what types and what pretty colors they are later. Until then, bye!

~Felderburg

Jail House Willy

So yesterday was kind of a long day. I started off the morning setting an appointment up with a doctor, and you know how ridiculous that can be. All I wanted was a simple blood test to make sure I didn't get any STDs in jail, you'd think it wouldn't be that hard to set up. Whatever. With any luck the result will turn out negative--you never know what you might have gotten in jail.

Speaking of jail, I was inspired by some of those guys yesterday to do some crazy viking stuff and braid my armpit hair. It was hard, but well worth it. Then I bought fishnets for my date with Jailhouse Willy. I heard he was into that sort of thing. Turns out he was. Into it. REALLY into it. We only watched the movie, and didn't even get to dinner before he took me back to his place for some, uh, shall we say... "good times?" Yes, I believe we shall. I think I'm going to stay at his place for the rest of the day. Goodbye!

The Law Can be Confusing

So I spent much of this morning writing a thank you note--letter, really-- to my mom, who bailed me out of jail this morning. It turns out asking young children back to my place to "hang out and ask questions about life" is against the law. Who knew? Anyways, the arraignment isn't for a while, so I'll let you know more as that approaches. On the plus side, the cops did keep me safe from any wayward coyotes thinking I was a giant chicken suitable for eating.

As far as the planner goes, I was supposed to dress up as either "wagnet youth" or "magnet garth" or "waynex yarth." I decided to go with a cowboy hat (for Garth Brooks) and a whole bunch of magnets. The party time I had was excellent. My computer didn't think so, which is why I am at an internet cafe, mostly naked (my costume had to be left at the door. Something about magnets and damage to the mainframe).

I'm pretty tired though, what with the jail time and party time, so I think I'm just going to have some nice down time with a sheep. Should be pretty relaxing. Felderburg, out.