The Law Can be Confusing

So I spent much of this morning writing a thank you note--letter, really-- to my mom, who bailed me out of jail this morning. It turns out asking young children back to my place to "hang out and ask questions about life" is against the law. Who knew? Anyways, the arraignment isn't for a while, so I'll let you know more as that approaches. On the plus side, the cops did keep me safe from any wayward coyotes thinking I was a giant chicken suitable for eating.

As far as the planner goes, I was supposed to dress up as either "wagnet youth" or "magnet garth" or "waynex yarth." I decided to go with a cowboy hat (for Garth Brooks) and a whole bunch of magnets. The party time I had was excellent. My computer didn't think so, which is why I am at an internet cafe, mostly naked (my costume had to be left at the door. Something about magnets and damage to the mainframe).

I'm pretty tired though, what with the jail time and party time, so I think I'm just going to have some nice down time with a sheep. Should be pretty relaxing. Felderburg, out.

Elementary Musings in a Chicken Suit

So I have a chicken suit now. I wasn't sure what to do with it, so I went and sat in my car for a while, thinking of all the amazing places I could go in a chicken suit.

I guess I didn't come up with that many, since I went back inside and played with a hair dryer.* This may not sound like the most fun of activities, but lemme tell ya, this hair dryer is crazy. It has all kinds of crazy shooty things coming out of it, for curls or something I'm guessing, and about a million different settings. It's very sleek and expensive looking. It also may not work anymore.

Anyways, I ended up just driving around, and I discovered an elementary school where the kids were playing some crazy kind of hopscotch/four-square/freeze tag or I don't even know. So I asked one to come over and explain it to me but I still don't get it (she obviously didn't do a good job). Either way, in watching these kids, I have become struck at how cool and unknowingly deep they are. I'm pretty sure if I were to ask one questions about life, the universe, and everything, they would either say "42" or respond with something so profound and beautiful it would hurt deep inside. I think I may just ask one to come home with me, just to hang out and ask crazy questions. I'm thinking one of the precocious girls, since the boys seem more intent on pushing other and picking their noses. I'll let you know how that goes. I just hope they're not scared away by my chicken costume.

~Felderburg



*I may have also been afraid that the coyotes would chase me, thinking I was a giant chicken.

That goshdarn Sunday

It messed up my plans again. Luckily, this means I have more time to prepare my chicken suit for tomorrow. And to maybe prepare myself for the planner's nonexistent Sundays for the remainder of the summer.